The Challenge: How to Be Single

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I am exhausted. I am defeated. I am throwing in the towel. I think I lost sight of what my New Years resolution was all about: To be single in Los Angeles for a duration of one year and embrace the dating scene. See, I think I forgot the key word, “dating” and unfortunately found myself replacing my epic made-up rap lyrics for love songs, my “no bullshit” attitude for an overly optimistic outlook and Swag Etiquette material went from a reflection of seemingly tragic dates reenacted with humor to a heartbreak confessional. Now I would have never realized the adjustment in my altered perspective of relationships until a good friend quoted, “now you’re just upset.” Alright, maybe you had to be there to understand the epic proportion of his statement but he did have a point. No longer was my blog what I intended it to be. However with countless heartbreaks, countless dates and a blog for the year of 2012, I think I have finally understood what exactly my New Years resolution was meant to achieve: How to be single.

 Let me explain. The idea is genius or quite possibly tragic so I beg you, stay with me on this one because you and I both don’t know how this date will end. I have an idea and I need you to be open minded about this.

Constantly I am giving advice I myself fail to follow. I tell those who come to me with concerns and heartbreaking material, the importance in knowing how to be alone. I am not talking about a 24 hour period of no contact with your other half nor am I talking about a two week break while you two take time to think things through. I am talking about waking up each day accepting that you will not wake up to a “Good Morning” text from him. I am talking about having one of the worst days and accepting he will not be there by your side at the end of the day. I am talking about accepting that there may never be someone. Remember when I said the idea might be tragic? Yea, this is that part.

If you know me, you know I like “lists.” I make lists of every thing, it’s a little out of control. I have a tendency to create a list with individual’s I can really imagine myself with. This list consists of places I’ve always wanted to see, food I’ve always wanted to try, and things I’ve always wanted to do, yet, so often it remains unfinished. This list was never completed, in fact, it has hardly been touched and I find myself wrapping up the year of 2012 with an incomplete list.

So here is the genius part: I am spending the remainder of 2012 completing my list, alone. Not sold on how it’s genius just yet? In a relationship, we find ourselves in a routine so often that we fail to forget what would happen if this person never existed. So often we forget how to be ourselves. So often we lack confidence in doing things, even mundane everyday things, by ourselves because we have forgotten what it is like to step outside without someone holding our hand. The reality is, these individuals can disappear from our lives in a matter of seconds for any given reason. I have seen it, time and time again.

So I take on this challenge, a challenge to complete my list. A challenge to recognize that there may not be another person in my life for quite some time but that this list still can and will be completed, just maybe not the way I had always imagined. The challenge begins, learn how to be single by completing lists of dates that "we" never had the chance to cross off, alone.

The Challenge: Complete 5 Incomplete Dates

First Date: Grab my favorite sweats, buy packs of ramen, rent a movie and watch it. Alone. Be prepared for an Instragram upload and an epic caption because without the second part of that date being completed, I may have extra time on my hands.

Second Date: Go to a restaurant I have always wanted try and dine. Alone. This is where Yelp! will be beneficial.

Third Date: Recently, a friend found himself in shock for my lack in movie knowledge. I came up with every excuse in the book but the reality was, I just never had anyone invite me to a movie in a really long time. Naturally, date three, see a movie. Alone.

Fourth Date: Spend a Sunday, the entire Sunday, in bed, with champagne, strawberries and candles. I might cheat on this one considering it might get awkward with the tragic aspect of doing this activity on my own.

Fifth Date: Attend a Spoken Word Poetry Slam. As a writer, an unpaid writer, I have always wanted to observe an event like this but never found that person who had the same interest, and when I did, we never got to cross it off the list. But I can guarantee, these writers wont have my kind of style.

Lesson: I don’t have a conclusion for how these dates will end nor can I tell you whether the idea is truly genius or an epic tragedy. What I can tell you is I stay true to my advice in that we all could use a little alone time and understand the importance in taking on tasks without a helping hand. Be ready for five either genius posts or epic tragic tales of a single girl taking on the Los Angeles dating scene, alone.